the maw of Fafnir

So after almost collapsing in my shower, I decided to spend the day at home yesterday. I hate being sick.

Also, my last fish died. Time to scrap the tank, I think.

At least I'm feeling better this morning and can actually eat non-mush food.

I was very unmotivated yesterday -- I think the rain dampened my spirits. Whatever the case, I ended up spending ~90% of the day in my apartment, alternately watching Deep Space 9 Season 1, reading a book, and staring at various lyrics online. I didn't actually leave the house until 10pm, when I was invited to go play board games at Green & Brown's, so I went over and we played Monopoly. I know, group of 5 gamers, and we decide to play Monopoly! Weird. In all fairness, there was a tiebreaker between Monopoly and Apples to Apples. No one had played Monopoly in a really long time, so it was kind of fun...

I honestly can't remember the last time I played Monopoly. I feel like it must have been sometime during freshman year of college or the summer after, but I can only remember playing Monopoly in Saudi with Kati. We'd eat cheese puff balls, read Calvin and Hobbes, and play epic games of Monopoly. I used to always play with the horse and cowboy when I was little, so that was my piece of choice. Anyway, David took an early lead, but by the end of it, I had rent immunity on enough properties and had enough well placed properties of my own that I ended up with total assets of over $16,000. Which is a lot of money in Monopoly, but not as much in real life. I doubt somehow I'd be able to build a house for $50, even if it were on Connecticut Ave. In any case, the game was relatively short (aka, 3 hours) since David and I decided not to duke it out after the other three players went bankrupt, but then there was some Smash and I didn't get home until 330am.

I love watching Smash. I have no idea why. I don't really have any interest in playing it, but it's fun to watch. This is odd, since I didn't play any of the games that the characters are from, so I'm constantly asking, "Who's that? What's that stage from?" Anyway, it reminds me of my last year at Stanford and going over to EAST and hanging out with various people in the lounge playing Smash. I don't really miss being in college, but I really miss having the ability to be online at 3am and find someone else to hang out with who's a five minute walk away. And how large group things just kind of materialized of their own accord -- now it's all about the planning. Ah, we could go here, we could do this, etc etc. Which reminds me, I should try and organize a Girls' Day with the few in-the-area girls and go up to the city or down to Santa Cruz or something.

Thing I'm happy about: sleeping in until 1145. Sleep is fantastic. Also, digestive biscuits with nutella are AWESOME for breakfast.
Thing I'm less happy about: This cold. It was supposed to clear up rapidly, but it seems to be hanging on a week later.
Thing I'm working on: Errands and packing. I'm going to NYC tomorrow night for a week...

I didn't really remember to post yesterday, so I'm backdating this entry. This might be because I got up, I went to work, I went home and went to bed. At six pm. Boy, I have an exciting life. Admittedly, this is coz I was still slightly sick, but so it goes. I feel a lot better today. Er, tomorrow. Whatever.

Anyway, it was a rather inauspicious day (or sarcastically auspicious, either way). I left the house without my glasses, had to go back and get them; nearly missed my train; fell asleep on the train and nearly missed my stop; discovered that the plane tickets I'd bought to NYC were wrong so I had to change them; and I was still sick. All in all, I could have done without the additional stress.

Thing I am happy about: Normalization of drama. This means, in short, that all-consuming emotional things are starting to settle out one way or another.
Thing I am less happy about: The price of tickets at Thanksgiving. While it is 150 dollars cheaper to fly from MA to CA than from CA to MA on the same days, it is still too expensive for Jeremy to come out and visit me.
Thing I am working on: Getting less sick. This one was obvious.

Today is easily represented by Bon Jovi lyrics:

Woke up this morning, and rolled out of bed
I felt like a dog who'd been kicked in the head...

and

Cause a bottle of vodka's still lodged in my head
and some blond gave me nightmares, I think that she's still in my bed...

I feel awful.. :(

ick. stupid new update page.

also - i am still sort of woozy sick but not sick enough to be at home nor sick enough to be sleeping a lot. just sick enough to REALLY NOT WANT TO WORK.

isn't life grand?

today, I am happy about: frivolous clothing. You know, that clothing that you buy not because you need clothing but because wearing it makes you smile. I have a bright magenta tanktop that i always squee with amusement when i wear it. I also have a bra which is all the colors of the rainbow (it matches my sheets, but without the white), and i wear it with the tank top and it is the awesome of awesomeness. today, it was underwear. also, victoria's secret convinced me that i look fatter in shorts than in just underwear. stupid shorts.

today, I am less happy about: those kinds of conversations that you have to have because not having them makes it worse down the line, but having them makes everybody sad and draws/creates lines/barriers.

today, I wish that I had some of alemara's mother's "very delicious 'I-need-to-take-better-care-of-myself' vegetable soup, chock-full of cabbage and carrots and everything tasty" not because i've ever had it but because that sounds like exactly the kind of soup I need. Or mom's chili. I also wish that I had just one more day of the weekend, so i didn't feel quite so rushed with work and life and stuff.